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I'm just a rainbow chaser... I define myself for myself...
Until we have seen someone’s darkness, we don’t really know who they are. Until we have forgiven someone’s darkness, we don’t really know what love is.
The only comfort right now

“Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And there is the love that will be ready.”
― Nayyirah Waheed

I lose.

I am not ok.


when everything you want to say to get it back sounds so pathetic.
when you can only speak with hurt in your chest. when all you do is ache in different corners of the room. when you wish to wipe him from your memory. when even sleep gives no reprieve. when you have to let go of all the lives you built.

You broke my heart but you don’t care.

I think there are parts of your
skin that only light up when
they’re touched by other hands
and I had forgotten what awake
felt like. Don’t worry about the
tremble, this is the shaking of
unused limbs. I was unnoticed
for so long that I had become
all spectator; I had become all
vicariously living, but you are
reminding me how to play and
everything inside me is cheering.

heart break. ache. ache.
a whole body ache.
no chance, just the swift removal of all futures. Othered for wanting more and wanting you. ache ache ache.

I just want someone who won’t get annoyed when I text them six times or in all caps. Someone I can go on long drives with and can sing along to the radio with. Someone I can eat pizza with at 2am and kiss at 6pm. Someone who chooses me everyday and never thinks twice about it.
Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life’s cruelest irony.